Get A Life

How many more reality shows do we need about addiction or some weird OCD disorder? I’m tired of hearing people say things like- “I can’t stop eating owl pellets” or “I can’t go to sleep without smelling all the couch cushions.” Enough. It’s called self control for crying out loud, and these people need to learn some.

I’m not addicted to anything. I’m just “extreme” about certain things. Being extreme isn’t a bad thing. It’s actually pretty cool. It means you’re passionate about your interests, and you live life to the fullest. Like for example- I’m extreme about flaming hot cheetos. I’m not addicted to them. So what if my fingers are always red, and it gets in my hair, and may have affected my last job. I’m not going to appologize for things that I like. I’m a flaming hot cheeto extremist okay? There’s nothing wrong with being an extremist.

Now see let’s compare me, to Roy Williams. Roy Williams is an overweight mayonnaise addict. A pig. Mayonnaise is not even real food. It’s really just a lubricant to get bad sandwiches down. The only people in recorded history who ate pure mayonnaise like that, lived during the Depression. And that was only when they ran out of hot garbage to eat.

I tried to help him break his addiction, but he wouldn’t listen. We happened to film it, and it’s going to be a reality show, and I happen to have a link to the trailer right here. It’s called Engrossed-

Engrossed Trailer

Oh and I’ll have you know, I am not a hypocrite. I have a clinic to run. An idiot would turn down the free advertising.

 

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